If you watch from the outside, you might think that one person will boss around, while the other will just do chores, or buy stuff. That is quite far from the actual state of things. Both the sub and the dom have their roles to play, and it should all be safe, sane, and consensual. Many believe that this kink works like submitting without limitations or boundaries, which is not true. In a BDSM relationship, one person will take a submissive role. An essential part for people who practice this is a power play. Of course, not every member of the BDSM community has the same sexual fantasies.
In general, the submissive partner will take the role of a slave or the bottom. Their goal is to submit to their dominant master completely. Furthermore, there are no preferences in how to talk to your sub, and anyone can be a sub. Whether it is a submissive male or a woman, they will have to obey any wish their dominant partner has. Moreover, they will completely relinquish control of the relationship. Depending on their master or mistressthey will need to perform specific tasks, purchase things for their dominant like accessories, clothes, jewelry, and others. A dominant will use their resources, body, or anything else they imagine.
If a sub fails to perform a task or obey, they will receive punishment. That can involve whips, chains, forced immobility, chastity belts, and such. So, if you are looking to be a perfect submissive for your dominant, there are several things that you should know and start practicing. There are so many roles and different types of submission.
Submissive training ultimate guide on how to train your sub
Some will enjoy being humiliated, acting as a pet, property, slave, and so on. One of the first rules of being a good sub is silence. You need to start practicing speaking less. Subs are not doormats, and not a single dominant would desire that. Dominants wish for someone who truly wants to be owned. Some people enjoy the feeling of helplessness and lack of control. They love passing the baton and letting someone else do all the work while they just serve. But you should know that doms have a huge responsibility on their own.
How to be an obedient submissive
It is not easy to be a dom, and your job is to make it possible and enjoyable for both. More importantly, when we say listen, we mean everything and not just what the dom says. You should also observe the body language and everything your dom does.
Everyone loves different things, and everyone is unique. Some doms enjoy bratty subs that just beg for punishment, while others require unquestioned worship. You will need to listen to your partner so both of you can enjoy the relationship. Furthermore, you must retain from asking questions while in the role. You are not the one that should talk about what they think or what they should do. There is a person in charge, and yours is to obey.
By taking the role of a true submissive, bottom male, you decide to allow your dom to make all the decisions. You need to subdue the urge to rebel or object to something if you truly aim to be a good sub.
That applies to both private and public life, in and out of the bedroom. You are obligated to do anything your dom desires. Naturally, subs are not perfect, and they will make a mistake from time to time, which might lead to punishment. If this happens, you should accept your disciplinary action willingly. Being a sub is a lifestyle. When it comes to sex life, you can prepare the toys that you want your dom to use on you. Then, your dom will decide what they want to do with it and which ones they want to use.
As dominants have a specific body language, so do subs. A good sub will know their place, and they will show it in every possible way. To achieve this, you can stand in the way that will make you appear smaller. For example, lowering your shoulders and keeping your head down.
Furthermore, you should make eye contact only if you are allowed to do so. Looking at your dom directly in the eyes might look rude and arrogant, which is not a good sub trait. So, keep your eyes on the ground. As doms sound confident and speak loudly, subs should do the opposite.
Handle with care: the fragile disposition of a submissive
Stay quiet, talk softly, and only speak when your dom asks you a question. That means things like knowing when to kneel or where to sit, and how to behave.
Sometimes, doms will order their subs to wear collars even in public. That is a great way to remind yourself that you belong to someone and to keep the slave mentality even outside of the bedroom. The best thing to do is to have training sessions and practice how to be a proper sub and learn a specific skill.
Even if you lack some expertise, you can quickly get better to satisfy your master. Maybe your dom wants you to cook for them, and you never managed to do anything but set the kitchen on fire.
12 things to do with your submissive – even if they’re far away
Your goal is to be the exact opposite of your dom. Forget all the sass and wise comments. Your dom will not enjoy that. Unless your master asks you for your opinion, you should keep it to yourself. Your master creates all the rules, decisions, and opinions, and you should accept them without arguing.
How to please your dom and be a good slave (be the perfect sub!)
Moreover, a good sub is polite not only to the dom but to everyone. As we mentioned, this kind of relationship is a lifestyle, and it can transfer well beyond private sessions. Some people enjoy switching between the roles, and these couples will agree on which position and the part they will take at a specific moment. For everyone else, it is a full-time position. Masters and mistresses love control, and if you give them that, and devote yourself, everyone will enjoy it. You will receive special treatment for being a good slave, and they will take care of you.
It is a win-win situation, and the only thing you need to do is obey.
The ultimate guide to being a submissive
Follow orders, and if you mess up, take your punishment. And most importantly, remember that your feelings about certain things mean nothing. For everyone wondering if they are good enough, you should know that being perfect is never easy. Beginner subs are often lost and have no idea how they could improve and become better in this area. Furthermore, they often look for a dominant to make them better and somehow fix them. In all truth, being submissive is not easy, and it requires a lot of work.
Real dominants know that subs have feelings and wishes as everyone else, and surrendering your control to such a person will be beneficial for both of you.
Finally, you will need to work, both mentally and physically, until it becomes your lifestyle. But if you find submission fulfilling, you will never regret surrendering full control to that special someone. They will know how to both reward and punish everything that you do for them, and it will be an incredible adventure for both of you.
Cart 0. Search Home Buzzing Offers! Your dom needs to know about these if you want to have a pleasurable relationship. What Is a Submissive? Practice Submissive Body Language As dominants have a specific body language, so do subs. Become Less Assertive Your goal is to be the exact opposite of your dom. Being a Perfect Sub For everyone wondering if they are good enough, you should know that being perfect is never easy.