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The pair had clashed over their love for Margaret Johnston, 34, the mother of Campbell's. Campbell was enraged after she dumped him and refused all contact - while sending widowed dad-of-three Bob intimate pictures of herself by phone. He and Stephen Crummack, 51, killed Bob and dumped his body in a shallow grave in sand dunes - before using the victim's mobile phone to send Margaret a vile message.

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Today I'm going to talk to you about some women writers who were Scottish, were contemporaries of Jane Austen but today are not so well-known as her. And what I'm going to do is tell you about who they were and why they're just as interesting and why they're worth reading. You've probably heard of Sir Walter Scott. He's certainly the big name of that period but before Scott was writing there were several women who were best-sellers, who influenced him and who he admired a great deal. I'm going to start by talking about one of them, Elizabeth Hamilton.

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Using Shakespeare to explore gender relations was a good example. The approach was to take the slimmest and most effeminate of the gay boys in the boarding house, stick him in a frock, shove two balloons up the front and call him Ophelia.

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In fairness he had a great deal of expertise because he was a changing rooms voyeur and the most enthusiastic pederast in the school. Can you imagine a better person to do sex education than an ex Army Major Chaplain who co-incidentally had lost his faith in God?

So Mary Magdalene got an ill informed and very unfair mention. But keeping away from loose women was a theme. Given that our exposure to women was confined to the School Secretary, Matron and the occasional teacher the opportunity to explore the feelings thoughts ambitions and god help usdesiresof these wonderful but alien creatures was very limited.

We had a dance once a year with our sister school.

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Ever seen music played to an entirely empty dance floor? Sex education was restricted pretty much to the underground passing on of dog eared magazines. I think I can summarise the total take away of relationships and sex education as follows Irritatingly but to the total amusement of my wifeI am utterly incapable 50 years on of walking on the inside part of the pavement with any women I am with.

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It is like someone has hardwired me to behave like a performing dog. However I have been married for 40 years I have begotten and now have a granddaughter so not everything has gone wrong. This week we have possibly the most difficult subject to approach, the murder of a lovely young woman full of life and promise by a sexual predator. The circumstances of my upbringing are extreme in comparison with todaybut actually not so long ago.

Like every man should, in the light of Me Too I have looked back at my relationships with women with an eye to what I might have done differently. The offence reflects behaviour that is so utterly extreme that it barely registers in a fraction of a fraction of a percentage point of crimes but the the press responsewhich is understandable, will now negatively affect and bring fear in to the lives of millions of women.

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We know that, we have seen studies from the impact of other such tragedies. It is only the police that are speaking right now of keeping this in proportion and for reasons that are obvious they are not well placed to make the point. There is also a real concern this offence will be focussed on to explain other less lethal but unacceptable behaviour by some men towards women. With this will come standpoints.

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I guarantee that there will be a swathe of ludicrous proposals on how we can better ensure the safety of women some from a feminist perspective some from misogynistic perspectives. I detest and abhor those who say that provocative dress is a part of this.

For starters what is provocative? There is zero evidence of that in this case and you demean her memory by even bringing the statement into the equation.

To generalise like that actually demeans the women who are offended against because it makes generalisation of an individual and personal experience. I met my wife in a telephone box. Well not entirely, I had spoken with her once in a queue but then I saw her distressed in a telephone box, some unhappy news, so although I was unknown to her I went to ask if she as ok.

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Would I do that now? Whenever things like this happen people come up with well intentioned simplistic solutions which usually are wrong.

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We cannot affect the behaviours of sexual predators by applying blanket restrictions to the whole of men kind. If we want to deal with the issue of inappropriate behaviour and offences against women we need to think differently. We need new ideas. She was reflecting the notion that probably nothing that we could do could stop an offence like this because predators do not behave to societal norms.

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What we can do is address the experience of women in relationships with men and vice versa by enabling discussion debate and give both sides learning opportunities to understand the other better. Laws need to be clear on what consent means, boys need to understand that better than they do and there are no excuses. When I say men and women I mean young men and young women interfacing at a time in their lives when the experience and learning will be with them through their lives.

One is that we have a government in Westminster who are the champions of knee jerk. The other is that many of them come from a background and are of an age that is not far from the experiences that I gave you earlier on. Do you trust Jacob Rees-Mogg to understand the nuances of gender politics in the last century let alone this one?

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When I was 19 my friend — a male friend — who is still my friend, taught me some basic self-defence. I am a small person, 5 foot one, heftier now that I was, but a slim little person at the time. He taught me how to use their own strength against them, and also how to hurt them as much as possible — disable them if possible — as quickly as possible — then run like hell. For males and females to have more respect for each other would be a better basis for relationships between the genders, but, failing that, in this imperfect world, if someone does attack you and you are smaller or weaker than them — whichever gender you belong to — a bit of even basic knowledge of self-defence tactics, anger and fighting dirty, can help.

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And I attended an all-girls Grammar School from to Any girl sniggering will leave the room. One of those plastic models with bits that you could take out and put back. That was it — that was our sex education. I was fortunate in that my family always had a lot of animals around — dogs having pups, cats having kittens — horses in a nearby field — not ours, but I took a great interest in them, and, when one of them was having her foal, my Dad helped her owner, and let me be there, too. People are innoicernt until proven guilty in a court.

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The Scythians: Challenging Perceptions. And, I also approach hard things with humour, so, here goes…. I had a pretty good idea of at least the biology of it. The rest — was instinct! Pingback: Men and women. Women and men — The Orkney News — reviewer4you. Leave a Reply Cancel reply. To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Our Cookie Policy.

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